Reality Checks

I can hardly believe that in three short months, I am going to be a mother.

Where has the time gone? 

While at times it has felt like this pregnancy has moved so slowly, overall it has actually flown by!

I am so excited for the next few months and cannot wait to be reconnected
with my family and friends. My head has been filled with so many ideas for the nursery, and I am so excited to finally be able to put all these ideas together and create the perfect little space for both Tegan and I! 

This weekend I was reminded once again by how precious life is. It is so easy to forget and slip into the hustle and bustle of each day. However, we must remember to take in each moment

and live life to the fullest, as you never know when it can all be taken away.

I have decided to spend these last three months, 

before I become a mom, enjoying the little things I love about my current life. 

There truly is not enough time in each day, to be distracted by the unpleasant things; often we stress too much about things that are unnecessary and simply let silly things upset us.

Once Tegan is here, I know my life will have a whole new meaning, and I am excited to shift my focus over to her. 

“Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it.” 
― Mother Teresa

I love these words from Mother Teresa, she truly was a wise woman. 

If we don't remember to do these things daily, than we aren't living at all, but merely are existing within the body we have been given. 

Life is a gift filled with abundant opportunities, so don't miss out on your chances. 

Glen, you had such a spirit about you that will always be remembered. I will never forget the first time I met you in our Spanish class. I knew from the very beginning that there was something very special about you. You were so full of life and charisma and you had such an impact on all the lives around you. My prayers continue for your family and friends that have been affected by this tragedy. I pray for peace in their hearts and that they know you are watching over all of us from up
above. While you were much too young to be taken away, you left this world living your life to the fullest. You were doing the one thing you had so much passion and love for. I admire you for always going and doing the things you wanted. You are in an even better place now, as you can rejoice and celebrate without the evils in this world surrounding you. 

How far along? 27 Weeks 2 days  

Total weight gain: Really hoping that I’m only at about 17-18.. that would mean I am right on track.. However, I still have two more weeks before weigh in.

Maternity clothes? Half and Half.. just got a cute jean jacket to throw over some of my summer dresses!  

Stretch marks? No, and in my opinion I think my skin tone still looks pretty good at this point. Only time will tell.   

Best moment this week: Realizing I only have a month left in this apartment! Ever since my morning sickness, I cannot stand the smell of my apartment or the high-rise building itself.

Miss Anything? Being able to move around without feeling like a wimp because my glutes are in so much pain.  

Movement: Not as much the past few days.

Food cravings: None, which has made it so much easier for me to eat healthy lately.

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nope.     

Gender: Girl

Labor Signs: None yet.   

Symptoms: I got these super bad cramps the other day, as I didn’t realize how long it had been since I last ate. As soon as I put some food in my mouth, they thankfully went away.  Other than that new symptom, still the lower aches in the back and glutes area.

Belly Button in or out? Widening, but still in!  

Wedding rings on or off? On and feeling pretty good.

Happy or Moody most of the time: Happy lately.

Looking forward to: My coworkers throwing me a baby shower on Saturday! 

Big Changes

Let me begin by saying I had a wonderful Memorial Weekend with my 

Husband, Family, and Friends. 

It was so nice to just relax and actually have three whole days to spend with my hubby!

While most of the weekend was fun and full of  relaxation, we also had

 some serious matter to get down to.

With my third trimester around the corner, I am starting to hit panic mode. 

I feel as though I still have so much to do and I suddenly realized that time is running out!

Today was a good day back to work, but also a really sad day.

I am so bummed to say that I gave my notice and as of the first weekend in July, I will be moving back to Vancouver.

I have been so fortunate to work at such an amazing office with the best group of girls possible and some pretty awesome bosses. I am truly going to miss them and quite honestly I am a bit terrifed to not be working come July. 

Since Randy is working over 3 hours away right now, I couldn't imagine going into labor up here all by myself. Moving home will allow me to have the support of my family

 and close friends in case of an emergency. 

Furthermore, they will be able to help get me by if needed until Randy is able to get to my side. 

While I am feeling a mix of emotions right now {excitement, sadness, anxiety, etc.}, I am trusting in God and knowing that all things will happen according to his plans. 

Here is to change.. big change.. 

(Sorry, just got out of the shower..)

How far along? 26 Weeks 4 days  

Total weight gain: I feel like I could seriously be close to 20lbs at this point. The last few days I have been so swollen and retaining a lot of water, ugh..  

Maternity clothes? Yes! Just bought a bunch this last weekend so I have a little more variety!

Stretch marks? Nope.. I even had Randy do a double take of my stomach to make sure.  

Best moment this week: Hanging out with my husband, friends, and family.. and Tegan kicking Randy in the head! ;)

Miss Anything? My body.. I feel like I am morphing into something unrecognizable.

Movement: All the time. I actually hate when she is “quiet” now.   

Food cravings: Still no cravings.   

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nothing in specific.    

Gender: Baby Girl

Labor Signs: None.  

Symptoms: I have been definitely experiencing back pain, my tailbone still hurts like crazy, and the swelling is out of control.

Belly Button in or out? Innie

Wedding rings on or off? On still  

Happy or Moody most of the time: Mixed

Looking forward to: My first baby shower in a couple of weeks!

Envisions of my Daughter's Future

Tegan has been moving like crazy and I absolutely love it!

I feel like I have waited for this moment for so long. 

While her little flutters have been great to feel, they are finally getting stronger and more frequent

and it is a constant reminder that there is this little human being growing inside of me!

I can tell that she is going to love music and I can only hope that she will have 

a passion towards dance like I once did and still do. 

If not, I know she will do great things no matter what!

I am so excited to support my daughter in all the things she will learn to love

and can't wait to go through the journey with her as she 

figures out the things she doesn't. 

How far along? 25 Weeks 2 days  

Total weight gain: 13-15lbs.. Hopefully no more. Every time I spend a weekend at my girlfriend Jaimie’s, I seem to put on weight a little quicker! Girl has snacks for days!!

Maternity clothes? I live for my maternity leggings. I hope to be getting a few more bottoms to wear when I’m down in Portland for Memorial Day weekend.. I have to find some cute maternity outfits for my photo shoot.

Stretch marks? None yet!

Best moment this week: Seeing my stomach move when Tegan kicks. She is getting stronger and stronger.

Miss Anything? Home. Even though I have been living up north for over a year and a half now, it just doesn’t feel like how “home” feels. I miss the convenience of being able to go over to my dad’s house whenever I want and going to all my favorite spots without the stress of traffic. With summer approaching, I definitely miss all our summer traditions with friends and the shenanigans we seem to get into.

Movement: Most definitely and they are becoming more frequent to where I can actually let people feel if they want.   

Food cravings: None.  

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nope.   

Gender: Female  

Labor Signs: None, but I hear I am getting closer and closer to when Braxton hicks can begin.

Symptoms: Starting to get a little back pain and still the tailbone pain. Feet are pretty swollen and sore by the end of my work days.  

Belly Button in or out? In

Wedding rings on or off? On. I am hoping I will still be able to wear it during my maternity shoot in like a month.

Happy or Moody most of the time: Pretty content, just miss my husband.   

Looking forward to: Starting my third trimester soon. CRAZY!

Emotions

Overall, I would have to say that throughout my pregnancy 

I have kept my emotions in check.

I haven't gone crazy psycho on Randy. 

I haven't cried over silly commercials or movies. 

I haven't been upset and thrown a fit because I haven't gotten my way. 

Etc. Etc. 

This weekend was a little different. 

I was definitely feeling down and for a number of reasons. 

Randy and I have done the long distance thing a number of times, but this has 

definitely been the hardest. 

While I encouraged him to take the job offer (better company, better job title, more OT hours),

I guess I wasn't prepared for how much this pregnancy would make me miss 

him even more! 

Our weekends together are pretty limited. 

We basically get all of Saturday to hang out and then I try to stay with him as long as I can on Sunday before I have to make the drive back north. 

This Sunday.. it was a struggle. I did not want to get in my car. 

My heart just sank knowing I had to leave him and that it would be another two weeks before I would see him again. 

Two weeks may seem like nothing, but lately it has been everything as I have really been feeling isolated and alone up here. 

Secondly, I was surrounded by the fact that it was Mother's day weekend more than ever this year. 

Yes, I am an expecting mom, but I haven't really done any true 

motherly duties for my daughter quite yet.

Sure, I gave up my body and she is having free rein with it, but really aside from that

I haven't earned the title of "mom" quite yet. 

I felt so blessed by all the warm wishes for a Happy Mother's day from those close and dear to me

.. but it was hard to throughly enjoy when I was missing my own mama so. 

This is the fourth year she has been gone and while each year they say 

it will get easier and easier, this pregnancy only made it that much harder. 

It was a reminder of all the things my daughter is going to miss out on, 

that I miss so terribly about my mom. 

While my mom had her own struggles at times, 

she was always filled with so much love and compassion..

and even though we didn't always see eye to eye, my mom taught me 

so much about life and what it is truly worth. 

One thing I know for sure, is to never take your loved ones for granted and the biggest thing 

I want for Tegan is to be surrounded by her family who love her so dearly already. 

I am blessed to have such an amazing family, both mine and Randy's, who love us unconditionally and support us through all our decisions and life changes. 

How far along? 24 Weeks 3 days  

Total weight gain: 13 lbs.. My Doctor told me she is very happy with my weight gain thus far and said that she wants me to gain at least 22-25 lbs. She said that for being more than half way through my pregnancy, even if I double my weight at this point, I would only be up 26 lbs, which is perfect.

Maternity clothes? 60% maternity clothes, 40% regular.. if I could, I would wear maternity clothes all the time (or clothes that I specifically bought for this pregnancy); however, it adds up quickly!

Stretch marks? No.. I did finally buy some belly lotion stuff this weekend though.   

Best moment this week: Randy feeling Tegan kick! She still doesn’t kick very strong, but I had told him I thought I might have felt her from the outside; it’s always hard to tell since I can for sure feel her on the inside. Well, every time she would kick and he would try to feel, she would stop. FINALLY, she was going crazy for a couple minutes and he was actually able to point out the kicks without me saying anything. He got it right on every time! J

Miss Anything? This week I was definitely missing my mama. It makes me sad knowing my daughter will never get to see her.

Movement: Progressively getting more frequent and stronger.  

Food cravings: Still no cravings, which is fine by me!

Anything making you queasy or sick: No more queasiness! Yay!  

Gender: Girlie Girl  

Labor Signs: None

Symptoms: tailbone pain, Charlie horses in my calves, spasms through the butt, starting to notice swelling by the end of the day.

Belly Button in or out? It is in, but Randy pointed out that it is definitely on its way to becoming an outie. I tried to deny it, but I guess it is getting shallower.

Wedding rings on or off? On!

Happy or Moody most of the time: Very emotional this weekend. Tried to keep myself in check, but eh.. What can you do.
Looking forward to: Finalizing our registry and planning the nursery.